Last night I went to see Pitch Perfect (Rebel Wilson is HILARIOUS) with Cait and some friends and when I got home, Jerrid was crabby. After asking him why he was crabby, his response was something negative (and not appropriate to post on here) regarding HIS Huskers. Seeing him like this over HIS Huskers it's no wonder he gets the way he gets when HIS wife is going through all that I am. Then, before going to bed last night, I logged onto Facebook, and many posts were Husker fans lives evidently coming to an end because of the outcome of the game. So...because of this and my crabby husband...I have decided that Husker fans need to get some real problems!
Speaking of real problems...here's an update on my "real problems":
I had a quick trip to Houston this past week for a very short visit with Dr. Janku regarding my treatment plan. He spoke to us about 2 different drugs that are both FDA approved. These drugs though are not FDA approved to be used together to treat cervical cancer; therefore, this will be considered a clinical trial. They are both in the pill form. I will take them both for the first five days and then alternate days after that. I will have to be down in Houston for the first four weeks in order to see my doctor weekly and be close if a problem would occur. Although, there aren't many side effects besides nausea, mouth sores, and high blood pressure. After the first four weeks, I will go home but will have to come back to Houston monthly after that. I will also get scans every 8 weeks. The goal of the combination of these two drugs is to shrink the tumors and cut off the blood supply to the tumors to prevent them from growing...sounds like perfect goals to me! So all of that sounds great, right? Yes it does, but of course it wouldn't be right if we didn't play the waiting game for awhile. So at the moment, we are waiting to make sure my insurance will approve one of the drugs. If they don't...back down to Houston ASAP for plan B. If they do...back down to Houston to start this clinical trial on October 18th.
So while I wait I will be spending some time at school getting my long term sub set up. Although, I don't think that will take much as they have hired a teacher who retired last year and has had all my students within the last three years. It's a HUGE stress relief to not have to worry about school and the students right now and instead focus on getting better and ALL that entails. I will also be getting a blood transfusion on Tuesday as my hemoglobin is still low. Hopefully this will bump up my hemoglobin and give me more energy. Lastly, I will be working on travel plans, housing plans, and getting things in order here for my boys while I'm gone.
One more thing...we may be looking for some friends and family to either drive down to Houston with me and/or spend some time down in Houston with me until my mom or Jerrid can get down there. I plan to drive down on the 17th and my mom probably won't be able to get down there til the 22nd, so if any of you are available during the 17th through the 22nd...please let me know.
Thanks for all your continued support and prayers!
Meighan
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Update...finally!
Sorry that it has taken me so long to update since my time at MD Anderson in Houston. Since I've been back, I have been super busy with a tremendous and successful benefit in my honor, Flynn's baptism, trying to rest and get my energy back, and making a trip to the ER. Yes, that is right...last night (or early this morning rather) we had to make a trip to the ER. About midnight I woke up with severe abdominal pain...at times it was so bad I thought I was in labor (but I knew better than this.) After about an hour of this and it not getting any better, Jerrid called Dr. Morris. This is also when the vomiting started. Dr. Morris called back and he told Jerrid to bring me in to the ER. After I was done vomiting the pain finally subsided. While at the ER they did an X-ray to check for a bowel obstruction, and everything looked good. SO...they really don't know what was causing me severe pain and vomiting. Since we left the ER, I haven't been nauseous, have been sleeping and resting a lot, but am not quite back to myself, as I still feel kinda cruddy and tired. Although I haven't really felt like myself since Saturday night, as I've been very exhausted and trying to catch up on sleep. So being up from midnight til 5:30 this morning, didn't help with catching up on sleep. Anyways I'm convinced that I probably caught a flu bug...probably in the airport or airplane. This doesn't make me too excited to hop back on 2 airplanes tomorrow to get to Houston again...
SO...now about the last trip to Houston, although I think all of you have seen updates on Facebook, or heard about it in person. Therefore, I'll make a long story short...
Thursday at MD Anderson was a long day with a lot of waiting, but totally worth every minute. I saw Dr. Westin (Gynecological Oncologist) and her Nurse Practitioner first. They were both great ladies, who made my mom and I feel very comfortable, and her Nurse Practitioner had definitely done her homework on me and my situation. I think she knew it better than Jerrid probably does (he may or may not choose to block some things out.) After their exam, my mom, my sister-in-laws Jina and Jessica, and I met with Dr. Westin about what she was thinking. She told us about so many options! This was such a relief to hear! Her #1 option was to send us over to Dr. Janku at the Targeted Therapy Center. There they focus on clinical trials and trials specific (or targeted) to individual patients and their individual cancers. She said if he doesn't have anything for me, she definitely would, but she wants to start with the "Hail Mary" here and really attack this! She made a personal call to Dr. Janku and somehow got him to see me that day. Remember how the first time I called MD Anderson and it was going to be a month before I could get it. I know he didn't have time in his schedule to see me, but he did it anyway. After Dr. Janku and his fellow did their homework on my situation he came in and told us he has about three different options he probably has for me. He wanted to do some additional testing (blood work and CT scan) to gain a little more information about my specific cancer versus just treating me as if I have cervical cancer like everyone else who has cervical cancer. He said the drugs he is wanting to try show promise and this too was great to hear! Everything we heard down in Texas gave us more and more HOPE! It's sounding like I'll be a part of a clinical trial at MD Anderson, so I will more than likely be taking a clinical trial drug along with an FDA approved drug. Since I will be a part of an MD Anderson trial, I will have to do all the treatment down there. Depending on how I handle the treatment, I could possibly travel back and forth, but at the beginning I have to plan to be down there for about 4 weeks. While down there my mom and I looked at a furnished apartment that would be a great place to spend 4 weeks away from home, if that is what I have to do. SO...I will find out on Thursday of this week what Dr. Janku's plans are for my treatment and we will quickly start planning the logistics as chances are I will be starting treatment very soon. I'm anxious to get down there and get this figured out, and even though I'm not sure what treatment is going to bring (side effects and logistics that may not be ideal), I am looking forward to getting started on treatment and getting that much closer to beating this cancer! My friend Holly is going to go down with me this time, and I'm thankful she is able to so my mom can stay and sub for me. I know work should be the last thing I worry about right now, but it's not. I hate being gone, and feeling as if I'm letting the kids and staff down at school. With my mom there in my place, I feel a lot better about being gone.
I know I said this was going to short, but you should all know by now I'm not good about doing short blogs. Anyways, I want to end with a HUGE thanks to everyone who came out on Saturday to support my family and me at a benefit in my honor. It was amazing to see all those who came and the generous donations given! A very big thank-you to my Aunt Kris, Rhonda Hope, and Denise Luna for coordinating the entire thing, and to all that volunteered their time to help out on Saturday. Also, thanks to those that donated items for the basket raffle...the baskets were awesome! This benefit just solidified what I've always known about the A-H-S-T Community. Everyone comes together in times of need while making a huge difference in people's lives! Lastly, a big thanks to all of the McCarthy's who traveled near and far to show their support and help out with the benefit! My family and I are so blessed to have such amazing friends and family in our lives, and are beyond thankful for all of your support!
THANK YOU!
Meighan
SO...now about the last trip to Houston, although I think all of you have seen updates on Facebook, or heard about it in person. Therefore, I'll make a long story short...
Thursday at MD Anderson was a long day with a lot of waiting, but totally worth every minute. I saw Dr. Westin (Gynecological Oncologist) and her Nurse Practitioner first. They were both great ladies, who made my mom and I feel very comfortable, and her Nurse Practitioner had definitely done her homework on me and my situation. I think she knew it better than Jerrid probably does (he may or may not choose to block some things out.) After their exam, my mom, my sister-in-laws Jina and Jessica, and I met with Dr. Westin about what she was thinking. She told us about so many options! This was such a relief to hear! Her #1 option was to send us over to Dr. Janku at the Targeted Therapy Center. There they focus on clinical trials and trials specific (or targeted) to individual patients and their individual cancers. She said if he doesn't have anything for me, she definitely would, but she wants to start with the "Hail Mary" here and really attack this! She made a personal call to Dr. Janku and somehow got him to see me that day. Remember how the first time I called MD Anderson and it was going to be a month before I could get it. I know he didn't have time in his schedule to see me, but he did it anyway. After Dr. Janku and his fellow did their homework on my situation he came in and told us he has about three different options he probably has for me. He wanted to do some additional testing (blood work and CT scan) to gain a little more information about my specific cancer versus just treating me as if I have cervical cancer like everyone else who has cervical cancer. He said the drugs he is wanting to try show promise and this too was great to hear! Everything we heard down in Texas gave us more and more HOPE! It's sounding like I'll be a part of a clinical trial at MD Anderson, so I will more than likely be taking a clinical trial drug along with an FDA approved drug. Since I will be a part of an MD Anderson trial, I will have to do all the treatment down there. Depending on how I handle the treatment, I could possibly travel back and forth, but at the beginning I have to plan to be down there for about 4 weeks. While down there my mom and I looked at a furnished apartment that would be a great place to spend 4 weeks away from home, if that is what I have to do. SO...I will find out on Thursday of this week what Dr. Janku's plans are for my treatment and we will quickly start planning the logistics as chances are I will be starting treatment very soon. I'm anxious to get down there and get this figured out, and even though I'm not sure what treatment is going to bring (side effects and logistics that may not be ideal), I am looking forward to getting started on treatment and getting that much closer to beating this cancer! My friend Holly is going to go down with me this time, and I'm thankful she is able to so my mom can stay and sub for me. I know work should be the last thing I worry about right now, but it's not. I hate being gone, and feeling as if I'm letting the kids and staff down at school. With my mom there in my place, I feel a lot better about being gone.
I know I said this was going to short, but you should all know by now I'm not good about doing short blogs. Anyways, I want to end with a HUGE thanks to everyone who came out on Saturday to support my family and me at a benefit in my honor. It was amazing to see all those who came and the generous donations given! A very big thank-you to my Aunt Kris, Rhonda Hope, and Denise Luna for coordinating the entire thing, and to all that volunteered their time to help out on Saturday. Also, thanks to those that donated items for the basket raffle...the baskets were awesome! This benefit just solidified what I've always known about the A-H-S-T Community. Everyone comes together in times of need while making a huge difference in people's lives! Lastly, a big thanks to all of the McCarthy's who traveled near and far to show their support and help out with the benefit! My family and I are so blessed to have such amazing friends and family in our lives, and are beyond thankful for all of your support!
THANK YOU!
Meighan
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Change of Plans
Well...there has been a slight change of plans in my treatment plan. Dr. Morris called on Friday and said that the clinical trial he wanted me to participate in just closed and isn't taking new patients at this time. So instead of him finding another clinical trial, he had his partner (who trained at MD Anderson) make some calls to MD Anderson to get me in earlier. This was a little disappointing at first, but once I took some time to take it all in and process it...I'm actually happier with this situation. MD Anderson is where I want to be, and I know they will find me the best treatment out there! Friday afternoon Jean, my oncology nurse, called and said they got me an appointment on September 27th down in Houston, at MD Anderson. WOO HOO! Less than two weeks away! My mom and I will be headed down on the night of the 26th and come back on the morning of the 29th. So no worries, we will still be at the golf benefit. You may not get to witness our dynamite golfing skills, but you'll definitely get to witness our dynamite socialization skills!
Until then I will be going on a very strict diet that is said to stop tumor growth. This is something Jerrid and I have come up with after all the research we have done. It could be brutal at times and very hard to stick to at times, but I WILL do it and it WILL make a difference in my health! In a nut shell it's basically a lot of raw veggies and fruit, and a lot of green juice! Brayden and Jerrid will continue to be my inspiration through this, and when I don't want to stick to it, just thinking of them will keep me going!
So even though, it seems that I can't catch a break when it comes to the big C, I still have so many blessings in my life. On the top of that list...the sweetest, most fun little 5 year old around, who rocks my world and the most caring, genuine, loving husband I could ask for. These two keep me going everyday, and do so much for me on a daily basis and they don't even know it. Their constant concern for my well being, the way the interact with one another, the little random kisses and "I love you's" that sneak up on me...they are my world and I will not give up because of them! Not too far down on my blessing list are my amazing, supportive, strong parents. No parents should ever have to watch their child go through all that I have. It brings me to tears just thinking about if I were in their situation with Brayden. I don't know how they do it, but they stay strong for me, and do absolutely everything they possibly can to support me and ensure that I will be ok. Next up, my "little" brother and sister (although, I'm much smaller than them now.) It has been such a blessing to have Caitlin back in Omaha and living only 7 blocks from us. She does ANYTHING we ask of her at ANYTIME. She is a huge help with Brayden and so much that goes on around our house. We couldn't have gotten through the last few months without her help and support. As for Evan, he's probably the most worried out of anyone, because that is just the way he is. No one would ever know that though because he goes on with his days just like any other, and that's what he needs to do in order to get through his days. He's got an amazing wife though who has done so much to support me and show us support from their little family. Evan's support shines through all that Linsey has done and continues to do! Lastly, I am so lucky to be blessed with all the wonderful family and friends I have in my life. I never could have imagined this amount of support, and I will never be able to thank you all for all that you have done and continue to do! I am still constantly getting mail, text messages, MULTIPLE daily messages and posts on facebooks, phone calls, gifts, ect. It almost makes me speechless just thinking about all that has been done for my family and all that people are continuing to do. So many people are reaching out to us to help in so many ways...it's simply outstanding and appreciated beyond words! Because I am so blessed in my life, I know sometime in the future, those blessings will carry over to my health!
Thank you for being a blessing!
Meighan
Until then I will be going on a very strict diet that is said to stop tumor growth. This is something Jerrid and I have come up with after all the research we have done. It could be brutal at times and very hard to stick to at times, but I WILL do it and it WILL make a difference in my health! In a nut shell it's basically a lot of raw veggies and fruit, and a lot of green juice! Brayden and Jerrid will continue to be my inspiration through this, and when I don't want to stick to it, just thinking of them will keep me going!
So even though, it seems that I can't catch a break when it comes to the big C, I still have so many blessings in my life. On the top of that list...the sweetest, most fun little 5 year old around, who rocks my world and the most caring, genuine, loving husband I could ask for. These two keep me going everyday, and do so much for me on a daily basis and they don't even know it. Their constant concern for my well being, the way the interact with one another, the little random kisses and "I love you's" that sneak up on me...they are my world and I will not give up because of them! Not too far down on my blessing list are my amazing, supportive, strong parents. No parents should ever have to watch their child go through all that I have. It brings me to tears just thinking about if I were in their situation with Brayden. I don't know how they do it, but they stay strong for me, and do absolutely everything they possibly can to support me and ensure that I will be ok. Next up, my "little" brother and sister (although, I'm much smaller than them now.) It has been such a blessing to have Caitlin back in Omaha and living only 7 blocks from us. She does ANYTHING we ask of her at ANYTIME. She is a huge help with Brayden and so much that goes on around our house. We couldn't have gotten through the last few months without her help and support. As for Evan, he's probably the most worried out of anyone, because that is just the way he is. No one would ever know that though because he goes on with his days just like any other, and that's what he needs to do in order to get through his days. He's got an amazing wife though who has done so much to support me and show us support from their little family. Evan's support shines through all that Linsey has done and continues to do! Lastly, I am so lucky to be blessed with all the wonderful family and friends I have in my life. I never could have imagined this amount of support, and I will never be able to thank you all for all that you have done and continue to do! I am still constantly getting mail, text messages, MULTIPLE daily messages and posts on facebooks, phone calls, gifts, ect. It almost makes me speechless just thinking about all that has been done for my family and all that people are continuing to do. So many people are reaching out to us to help in so many ways...it's simply outstanding and appreciated beyond words! Because I am so blessed in my life, I know sometime in the future, those blessings will carry over to my health!
Thank you for being a blessing!
Meighan
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Game Plan
Today we met with Dr. Morris to learn about a clinical trial that I am eligible for. This clinical trial is for cervical cancer patients whose cancer is persistent or has re-occurred and previous treatment has not worked. The drug is called brivanib and is in a pill form. The hope is that this drug will attach to and stop (turn off or inhibit) a protein called vascular endothelial growth factor receptor 2 (VEGFR2) from working. VEGFR2 works by turning on or stimulating the growth of tumor blood vessels. It also works by turning on the growth of tumor cells. Brivanib will also hopefully attach to and stop another protein called fibroblast growth factor receptor (FGFR) from working. FGFR is another type of protein that works by turning on or stimulating the growth of tumor cells. By stopping VEGFR2 and FGFR from working, brivanib will hopefully cause the cancer to shrink by stopping the growth of tumor blood vessels and tumor cells. So, as you read, you can see there is a lot of "hoping" when it comes to this clinical trial and any clinical trial for that matter. That is the point of clinical trials, to try something out to see if it's going to work. There is obviously good reason, research, and facts to believe though that this IS going to work, otherwise, there would not be a clinical trial. At the moment there are not a lot of treatment options out there for cervical cancer. Therefore, by doing this clinical trial, I'm not only going cure my cervical cancer, but pretty much pave the way for cervical cancer treatments in the future...no big deal! As my dad always said, "Go big or go home!" Actually, my dad has never said that, but I like to say that he has!
So...now what? Well tomorrow I will be heading in for multiple tests (chest CT, ECHO, EKG, blood tests, ect.) to ensure that I qualify for the trial, but Dr. Morris doesn't see any reason why I wouldn't. Those results should all be in my Monday, and I will hopefully be able to start by the middle of next week. The treatment regimen itself only involves taking 4 pills at the same time every day and then going in weekly for blood pressure checks and routine blood tests. As with any drug, there are side effects, and most of them seem very similar to chemo side effects (fatigue, weakness, nausea, vomiting, loss of appetite, headaches.) So we will see if this affects me or not, as always, I'll just take things one day at a time.
Even though I'm going to start the clinical trial, I am still going to go down to MD Anderson. I have an appointment with them on October 16th. This appointment is not only for a second opinion/piece of mind, but also to hear if they have any other options for me.
Thank you for your continued support, prayers, and never hosing hope!
Meighan
So...now what? Well tomorrow I will be heading in for multiple tests (chest CT, ECHO, EKG, blood tests, ect.) to ensure that I qualify for the trial, but Dr. Morris doesn't see any reason why I wouldn't. Those results should all be in my Monday, and I will hopefully be able to start by the middle of next week. The treatment regimen itself only involves taking 4 pills at the same time every day and then going in weekly for blood pressure checks and routine blood tests. As with any drug, there are side effects, and most of them seem very similar to chemo side effects (fatigue, weakness, nausea, vomiting, loss of appetite, headaches.) So we will see if this affects me or not, as always, I'll just take things one day at a time.
Even though I'm going to start the clinical trial, I am still going to go down to MD Anderson. I have an appointment with them on October 16th. This appointment is not only for a second opinion/piece of mind, but also to hear if they have any other options for me.
Thank you for your continued support, prayers, and never hosing hope!
Meighan
Monday, September 10, 2012
Third times a charm!
First of all I'd like to thank all of you for your support and concern. Not only do I appreciate all of the texts, Facebook posts and messages, and phone calls, but I know my family and Jerrid do too. People are constantly checking in on me and that means a lot.
As many of you know I had a scan on Friday. Today, I got the results and they weren't what we were hoping for. The chemo cocktail I have been on hasn't worked like we had hoped and the tumor in my abdomen has actually grown. I also still have spots on my liver. After hearing that, I didn't really ask anymore questions regarding the tumors, I just said, "Ok, where do we go from here?" Dr. Morris first assured me that we are not out of options and we just need to try something else until we find one that works. He then said he would be taking my case to the Tumor Board on Thursday morning. Here all the cancer specialists look at my case and weigh in on what they feel is the best option for me. Dr. Morris also said I am eligible for a clinical trial. So, I'm going to go in on Thursday morning and hear what Dr. Morris has to say regarding what the Tumor Board has come up with and learn more about this clinical trial. I feel very good about clinical trials as a whole, as they are usually the latest and greatest treatment out there. I'm also looking into traveling to MD Anderson in Houston to see what they have to say about my case. It's not that I don't trust Dr. Morris, but I feel like getting a second opinion at this stage of the game will give us all piece of mind. MD Anderson is the #1 cancer center in the US and leading the way with research and new treatments for cancer every day. I know Dr. Morris will support my decision to go to MD Anderson for a second opinion as he was the first one to tell me about them in the first place. I will hopefully hear from MD Anderson in the next 24 hours regarding when I can get in for an appointment...hopefully it's very soon. The last thing I want to do is put off treatment or the clinical trial Dr. Morris wants me to do to wait for a second opinion. I want to get started on this next treatment as soon as possible, and really kick the shit out cancer this time around! Third times a charm, right?
I am doing fine right now because I know that everything will be fine. I feel great and have so much fight left in me that this cancer doesn't stand a chance. I want to live and win this battle much more than it does. Cancer does not scare me! My only worry right now is Jerrid, my family, and Brayden. I hate that they have to deal with news like this and watch me go through all of this. I keep assuring them I'm fine and that everything will be fine, but it's hard for them to be reassured. I know they feel helpless as do many of you, but I assure them and you that you are all doing so much for me. It is all your cards, comments, texts, phone calls, emails, ect that help me get through the days. I have posted so many of your cards, quotes, and prayers on my bathroom mirror...it is a great positive way for me to start my days! I have also posted quotes and prayers on my computer...therefore, the two things I stare at most in a day (besides the lovely faces of my students) continue to lift my spirits and keep me positive. So really, I don't need much, just your continued prayers and support and maybe some new bubble bath and a body pillow...but really, I don't need much! :) If I could ask for one thing though...while you are praying for me, please pray for Jerrid, Brayden, and my family. I think they need strength more than I do right now.
I will keep you updated on how Thursday goes and where my treatment is headed from here, but until then I assure you that...
"This is just another test God gave me, and I know just how to handle this...I'll hold my head high, I'll never let this define the light in my eyes, love myself, give it hell, I'll take on this world, yes I'll stand and be strong, no I'll never give up, I will conquer with love, and I'll fight!"
As many of you know I had a scan on Friday. Today, I got the results and they weren't what we were hoping for. The chemo cocktail I have been on hasn't worked like we had hoped and the tumor in my abdomen has actually grown. I also still have spots on my liver. After hearing that, I didn't really ask anymore questions regarding the tumors, I just said, "Ok, where do we go from here?" Dr. Morris first assured me that we are not out of options and we just need to try something else until we find one that works. He then said he would be taking my case to the Tumor Board on Thursday morning. Here all the cancer specialists look at my case and weigh in on what they feel is the best option for me. Dr. Morris also said I am eligible for a clinical trial. So, I'm going to go in on Thursday morning and hear what Dr. Morris has to say regarding what the Tumor Board has come up with and learn more about this clinical trial. I feel very good about clinical trials as a whole, as they are usually the latest and greatest treatment out there. I'm also looking into traveling to MD Anderson in Houston to see what they have to say about my case. It's not that I don't trust Dr. Morris, but I feel like getting a second opinion at this stage of the game will give us all piece of mind. MD Anderson is the #1 cancer center in the US and leading the way with research and new treatments for cancer every day. I know Dr. Morris will support my decision to go to MD Anderson for a second opinion as he was the first one to tell me about them in the first place. I will hopefully hear from MD Anderson in the next 24 hours regarding when I can get in for an appointment...hopefully it's very soon. The last thing I want to do is put off treatment or the clinical trial Dr. Morris wants me to do to wait for a second opinion. I want to get started on this next treatment as soon as possible, and really kick the shit out cancer this time around! Third times a charm, right?
I am doing fine right now because I know that everything will be fine. I feel great and have so much fight left in me that this cancer doesn't stand a chance. I want to live and win this battle much more than it does. Cancer does not scare me! My only worry right now is Jerrid, my family, and Brayden. I hate that they have to deal with news like this and watch me go through all of this. I keep assuring them I'm fine and that everything will be fine, but it's hard for them to be reassured. I know they feel helpless as do many of you, but I assure them and you that you are all doing so much for me. It is all your cards, comments, texts, phone calls, emails, ect that help me get through the days. I have posted so many of your cards, quotes, and prayers on my bathroom mirror...it is a great positive way for me to start my days! I have also posted quotes and prayers on my computer...therefore, the two things I stare at most in a day (besides the lovely faces of my students) continue to lift my spirits and keep me positive. So really, I don't need much, just your continued prayers and support and maybe some new bubble bath and a body pillow...but really, I don't need much! :) If I could ask for one thing though...while you are praying for me, please pray for Jerrid, Brayden, and my family. I think they need strength more than I do right now.
I will keep you updated on how Thursday goes and where my treatment is headed from here, but until then I assure you that...
"This is just another test God gave me, and I know just how to handle this...I'll hold my head high, I'll never let this define the light in my eyes, love myself, give it hell, I'll take on this world, yes I'll stand and be strong, no I'll never give up, I will conquer with love, and I'll fight!"
Friday, August 24, 2012
For your chemo day distraction...
One frequently asked questions..."Hey Butts, can I get arrested for _____?"
I should probably share a little background info regarding this. First of all, for those of you who are wondering who the heck Butts is, it's Jerrid. That is what Brayden has called him from day one. Not sure why...I think he meant to say something else, but he couldn't talk very well and it came out "Butts" and it has stuck and quite frankly we like it! :) Secondly, Brayden is very concerned with getting arrested. When Brayden was three he had his first and last incident with taking something from a store, but it was obviously a learning experience. Every since the Florida State baseball player was arrested during the CWS, Brayden has been asking us multiple times a day if he will get arrested for doing certain things. Things like: saying "Holy Guacamole", jumping on Butts' back, calling aunt Cait stinky or telling Aunt Jina she can't sing (no, as long as you only call Aunt Cait and Aunt Jina stinky...that is fine, but no one else), putting his feet up on the back of my car seat, and many more random things. He literally asks these questions at least 23 times a day, and whenever he hears a "rearing sound" as he would call it...most people call them sirens...he comes running to find out if they are coming for him or he hides! :) Brayden really is a sweet little boy and really does nothing that even gets him in trouble let alone would get him arrested...he's just very neurotic for the time being I guess! :) Ok...now that you have some background...on to my chemo distraction/entertainment for the day..."Hey Butts...can I get arrested for....."
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| "Golfing in your 44DD bras?" OUTSDIE of your shirt none-the-less! |
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| "Looking hot in women's clothes?" |
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| "Having a bloody mary before noon on a school day?" Oh how I wish that were legal! |
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| "Decorating your husbands golf cart with GIANT boobs?" |
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| "For throwing dog poop over my bitchy neighbor's fence?" |
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| "For 'Jay' walking?" (that's my cousin Jay) |
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| "For sucking on my babies binky while watching Olympic wrestling?" Evan needs to be shut up more than Flynn...this is actually pretty fitting! :) |
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| "What if I put the dog poop in a bag on her porch and light it on fire?" HAHA! This lady really must be bitchy! |
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| "Allowing your dog to appear in public NAKED?" Isn't she the cutest thing ever? Brayden is now telling everyone that Riley is bald like his mom! :) |
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| "Making Thomas be the octopus?" |
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| "Planking in a public restroom?" Anyone who knows these two...knows that they probably do far worse that could get them arrested! :) |
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| "Wearing matching hot pink mohawk wigs when you're not even bald?" |
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| "Looking hotter than your girlfriend in skinny jeans?" |
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| "Driving the boat after 2 margaritas?" She shouldn't be driving the boat sober!!!! I'm actually thinking of going to Okoboji to relax for the weekend...how am I going to relax if she's driving the boat?! |
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| "Wearing camo mini skirts when you're over 40?" |
So even though I was at Estabrook yesterday from 7:30 to 5...I had a lot of great distractions that made the time go by pretty quickly.
Now for a little update on me and my journey. The shot I had to have last time that caused me a lot of muscle soreness didn't really do it's job...my hemoglobin was the same...very low. Low enough that would warrant a blood transfusion for most people, BUT I'm not like most people. :) My oncology nurse was "blown away" but how great I was feeling and doing even though my hemoglobin was so low. She was saying most people with these stats get winded very easily, going to the grocery store is too much for them, ect. Well, I'm feeling great! Not only am I going to the grocery store, I'm working and on my feet a lot, walking on the treadmill or running back and forth through the halls of school...in heels none-the-less, and getting out and about and not getting winded. I guess I'm trying to sit when I can at school because I don't want to over do it, but I have yet to feel winded, so until it gets to that point or if my hemoglobin really drops, I won't have to get a blood transfusion. Jean and Dr. Morris's PA said I could try the shot again if I wanted but they were leaving it up to me. I told them I really didn't want it because I think it called me more bad than good. Also, I've had 2 blood transfusions in the past and those have worked and I didn't have any side effects from them, so I would rather do that if it comes to it than go through the pain of that shot when I don't think it's going to help me. They were fine with that as long as I promised to call right away if I started to feel windy, a lot more tired, or just not like myself anymore. I promised them my husband would definitely be calling them if it got to that! :) Yesterday we also scheduled my next scan...September 7th! I of course am looking forward to this, my husband is not...he hates scan days more than just about anything! We are working on him having a positive outlook...he's getting better. As I told him...I am not having the pain that I was having; therefore, my tumors have to be shrinking. I am also feeling great...if things were getting worse, I would think that I would be getting worse and I am not! No matter what the scan shows we will either continue with the treatment regime I am on, or we will find another one! I also told Jean to relay a message to Dr. Morris for me. "You tell Dr. Morris that when he calls me with the results of the scan to have a plan. I don't want to hear the results and then have to schedule an appointment to come in and talk about things. Good or not-so-good (although I know it's going to be good...there still may be a different plan from here)...I want to know that day what the plan is." She smiled and laughed said she'd be sure to tell him...so we'll see! We also scheduled my next chemo for Sept. 13th...so lots of fun things to look forward to. I know...you're thinking I'm crazy calling them fun, but honestly to me they are. They are things I look forward to because it makes me feel as if we are doing things to beat this. Sometimes the weeks in between get really long and I just want to get back to my comfort zone of Estabrook with Dr. Morris and my awesome nurses, and work on killing these disease that threatens my body.
So until the next time...
Today I'm going to hang out with the two best friends a girl could ask for...Kellie and Holly. I'm sure there will be lots of laughs, as there always are with those two. The best part...it doesn't hurt to laugh anymore so bring on the laughs girls! I'm also thinking about going up to Okoboji for the weekend to relax with my parents and Cait. Jerrid is pretty busy with weekend with cross country, and Brayden is with his dad...so it's a good weekend to get away and so far I'm still feeling great! Hopefully I continue to feel well and get back to work on Monday and that will keep me very busy! We also have plans to go back to Jerrid's families over Labor Day. His sister, Jessica, and her family will be back from Texas and we haven't seen them since Christmas so it will be great to see them.
I know this blog is getting pretty lengthy, but I just want to end with this. My sister-in-law, Linsey, and I were just having a conversation yesterday regarding "getting some real problems." Everyday you are going to have frustrations in your day, and you are going to feel sorry for yourself. Everyone has these moments or days, but I think through these times it's important to think that it could always be worse. Be thankful for all the blessings you do have in your life, and it will help you overcome your frustrations and bad days. A tragedy happened in my hometown yesterday, and it's sad that sometime terrible things have to happen in order for people to put things into perspective. So, I urge to always be thankful for your blessings, thank someone for your blessings, and keep things in perspective...because it can always be worse and chances are someone out there is going through a lot worse things than you are. Lift those people up in your prayers when you're praying and thanking whoever you pray to and thank for your blessings.
Hopeful for everyday to be a better day,
Meighan
Thursday, August 2, 2012
How I do it...
Throughout this last year, I've had so many people tell me what an inspiration I am. They also share with me the changes they have made in their lives because of what I am going through in my life. I am so happy to hear about all the positive changes that have come out of this stage of my life. I've also had some friends share my blog with friends of theirs, or friends of friends who are currently battling cancer, and many of them ask me how I stay so positive. These reasons have led me to this blog tonight (and the fact that I'm super bored!) I thought I would share how I stay positive and the things that inspire me to keep going, in the hopes that it reaches out to someone else and will help them.
1. Start everyday with prayer. I haven't always been the most religious person, but I don't think you have to be in order to pray. I read a book stating that as long as you pray to someone, it will help you handle things. Therefore, along with praying to God, I pray to the Peggy's. I pray to my Grandma Peg, and a dear friend Peggy B. These two phenomenal women fought cancer for many years and lost their battle. BUT...I believe that their lost battle will end with my winning battle. I couldn't have two stronger women up there fighting for me and giving me all the strength and healing that I need to succeed. If you know Peggy B, you know that she was always the last to leave a party...so I know that she will continue to fight for me until cancer has left my body. So no matter who you are praying to, start your morning off right, by praying. Along with praying for things you need, be sure to pray for all that you currently have and thank someone for them.
2. Reminders. When I get cards from people, or read/hear motivational quotes, I either write them down or keep them in my journal. I refer to these whenever a negative thought enters my mind. I have been given different motivational pictures that I have throughout my house that also help me remind me to stay positive and always hope. It's actually been proven that your every thought and emotion causes a chemical response in your body. Therefore, what we think and what we tell ourselves can either support or undermine our health. Stay positive!
3. Allow yourself time to grieve. I give myself one time every three weeks to feel sorry for myself and cry. It usually happens a few days after chemo because I'm so sick of having no energy, feeling achey, bored out of my mind, ect. It's a good release and just what I need to keep fighting.
4. I'm in the driver's seat. This is my cancer and I will handle it and fight it how I want to. Of course I take medical advice from my doctor, but I do my own research. My husband does his research. We are using a lot more than modern medicine to beat this. Changing my diet, taking many different supplements, going to the chiropractor and reiki, getting physical exercise, and many other things are all things that I am in control of and gives me a sense of pride when beating this. I not only have to beat this toxin in my body, but I have to keep a strong body and immune system while doing it. The stronger my body is while going through treatments, the stronger I am going to be to fight off this disease. So get in the driver's seat and take control...this is your body, no one else should be in charge besides you!
5. Find a support system. Whether you are fighting cancer, wanting to work out more, or wanting to lose weight...you need a support system. Surround yourself with those that support what you are doing and lean on them when things get to be too much. The support system that my family and I have had through the last year has been simply amazing. There is always someone there to say the right thing, to babysit on a moment's notice, to drive me to an appointment, to bring over a treadmill or heating bad, to feed us, to clean our house, to help with monetary donations to help pay for medical bills, to say the right thing or send a card at the right now...I think you get the idea by now. It is our support system who helps get us through the days, weeks, and months...thank you!!!!
6. Find your inspiration. Why are you doing what you're doing? What is inspiring you to make this change or do all that you're doing?
My inspiration:
I fight my hardest everyday for these two. I drink awful juice for these two. I swallow a crap ton of supplement pills everyday for these two. I get on the treadmill everyday for these two (it was hard enough to get me on the treadmill before cancer, let alone on the days after chemo.) I go to 2 chiropractor appointments and one reiki appointment every week for these two. I know what you're thinking...don't you do all of this for yourself? Well of course I do...I do all of this for me health, but I do it so I can be around for many years to come for these two. Jerrid and I just celebrated our one year anniversary and Brayden is only going to be 5 in September. We have so many great years ahead of us, and so many things to still do in our life together. Waking up to them, watching them play together, listening to their conversations, ect. is what inspires me on a daily basis. I know I have to keep fighting and keep going for them. As much as I know they need me...I need them so much more!
1. Start everyday with prayer. I haven't always been the most religious person, but I don't think you have to be in order to pray. I read a book stating that as long as you pray to someone, it will help you handle things. Therefore, along with praying to God, I pray to the Peggy's. I pray to my Grandma Peg, and a dear friend Peggy B. These two phenomenal women fought cancer for many years and lost their battle. BUT...I believe that their lost battle will end with my winning battle. I couldn't have two stronger women up there fighting for me and giving me all the strength and healing that I need to succeed. If you know Peggy B, you know that she was always the last to leave a party...so I know that she will continue to fight for me until cancer has left my body. So no matter who you are praying to, start your morning off right, by praying. Along with praying for things you need, be sure to pray for all that you currently have and thank someone for them.
2. Reminders. When I get cards from people, or read/hear motivational quotes, I either write them down or keep them in my journal. I refer to these whenever a negative thought enters my mind. I have been given different motivational pictures that I have throughout my house that also help me remind me to stay positive and always hope. It's actually been proven that your every thought and emotion causes a chemical response in your body. Therefore, what we think and what we tell ourselves can either support or undermine our health. Stay positive!
3. Allow yourself time to grieve. I give myself one time every three weeks to feel sorry for myself and cry. It usually happens a few days after chemo because I'm so sick of having no energy, feeling achey, bored out of my mind, ect. It's a good release and just what I need to keep fighting.
4. I'm in the driver's seat. This is my cancer and I will handle it and fight it how I want to. Of course I take medical advice from my doctor, but I do my own research. My husband does his research. We are using a lot more than modern medicine to beat this. Changing my diet, taking many different supplements, going to the chiropractor and reiki, getting physical exercise, and many other things are all things that I am in control of and gives me a sense of pride when beating this. I not only have to beat this toxin in my body, but I have to keep a strong body and immune system while doing it. The stronger my body is while going through treatments, the stronger I am going to be to fight off this disease. So get in the driver's seat and take control...this is your body, no one else should be in charge besides you!
5. Find a support system. Whether you are fighting cancer, wanting to work out more, or wanting to lose weight...you need a support system. Surround yourself with those that support what you are doing and lean on them when things get to be too much. The support system that my family and I have had through the last year has been simply amazing. There is always someone there to say the right thing, to babysit on a moment's notice, to drive me to an appointment, to bring over a treadmill or heating bad, to feed us, to clean our house, to help with monetary donations to help pay for medical bills, to say the right thing or send a card at the right now...I think you get the idea by now. It is our support system who helps get us through the days, weeks, and months...thank you!!!!
6. Find your inspiration. Why are you doing what you're doing? What is inspiring you to make this change or do all that you're doing?
I fight my hardest everyday for these two. I drink awful juice for these two. I swallow a crap ton of supplement pills everyday for these two. I get on the treadmill everyday for these two (it was hard enough to get me on the treadmill before cancer, let alone on the days after chemo.) I go to 2 chiropractor appointments and one reiki appointment every week for these two. I know what you're thinking...don't you do all of this for yourself? Well of course I do...I do all of this for me health, but I do it so I can be around for many years to come for these two. Jerrid and I just celebrated our one year anniversary and Brayden is only going to be 5 in September. We have so many great years ahead of us, and so many things to still do in our life together. Waking up to them, watching them play together, listening to their conversations, ect. is what inspires me on a daily basis. I know I have to keep fighting and keep going for them. As much as I know they need me...I need them so much more!
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